A report from the Canadian version of The Onion regarding the mounting instances of coyotes showing up in urban areas:

“A coyote that has been seen wandering around the campus of the University of British Columbia has suddenly found himself with more than $21,000 in outstanding student loan debt.”

According to the story in The Syrup Trap, the unassuming Canis latrans was shocked to get dunning notices after making a wrong turn out of the forest.

“All I did was eat a squirrel near the Main Library and make eye contact with a professor,” he told the press. “Many students spend five, sometimes six years bathing, breeding and foraging on this campus. I can’t imagine what their costs are like.”

Contacted for comment, bureaucrats at the university showed little empathy (a trait they share with U.S. counterparts):

Said the school’s VP for student life: “I don’t care if you’re an animal – a wolf or a bird or whatever. Many of our students manage to complete undergraduate degrees without displaying any higher-order cognitive functioning.”

Thanks to superstar blogger Glenn Reynolds at Instapundit.com (himself a law professor at the University of Tennessee) for bringing this item to his readers’ attention.

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